Not Your Typical Christmas LetterIt's been awhile since I've written, and I fear a novel is at my fingertips today. You've been warned. I think 2008 will go down as a fitting end to the roaring 20's of my life. Perhaps it's just a symptom of growing older that every year seems harder than the previous, but this year I really believe it to be true. Am I the only one that gets a little annoyed (jealous is a truer word I suppose) of the families that send out those cute little Christmas cards with professional-looking "family newsletters" with little updates and photos of smiling children and happy marital bliss? I don't have the time to desire to publish such a thing, honestly, and besides, I have so few photos of the four members of my family together. Either I'm the one behind the camera or we're simply too busy living life to stop and capture it in ones and zeros (ironic that we bought a new digital camera this year I suppose). And even if I did have the time and the photos to put in such a letter, if I were to write it honestly it might be a bit depressing. Is there any better word to describe this year than "busy"? Everyone loves to attach that cliche to their lives, and inside I chuckle a bit to see those who have no idea claim it for themselves. I'd be an idiot to say my life is "harder" than most, it certainly isn't, but I'll defend the title of "busiest" against all comers. It would be foolishness to try to list all that my wife and I have done this year. Those that know us well know most of it anyways. Speaking of which, I think we're often viewed by our peers as something of an enigma; we're often asked how we survive the unrelenting onslaught of our lives. That's an excellent question. Some days I wonder if we're really surviving at all. But "survival" isn't the goal, at least if I understand my Bible correctly. Is not survival nothing more than the idol of "comfort" reduced to its core? My wife and I are driven people, and we often push ourselves beyond the threshold of what is physically healthy, beyond what is financially responsible, beyond what is relationally secure. But is that not the heart of Christianity, to die to self? To place all on the altar? To "give and hold nothing back", as the Smalltown Poet might say? Paul beat his body into submission for the sake of the gospel. Should I give any less? Perhaps I'm wrong. Believe me, it's something I think about often. Do I let my kids watch too much TV because I have to fold the laundry and clean the house because Sara had to go out after I got home from work to buy lunch for 20 for the next day's IWT meeting which she couldn't do during the day because she spent three hours on the phone organizing a prayer chain for a MOPS friend of hers whose baby is sick, racking up a cell phone bill that is way more than what the average family should have to pay, which means we can't pay the credit card off in full this month unless we reduce our giving to the church for the week, but isn't that something we've committed to in the first place, and what's a small finance charge compared to being unfaithful to our church family, and I could go on and on, and pretty soon we're sick, broke, and getting in fights way too easily. Could God possibly bless all of that insanity? I certainly hope so. Because I'm failing as a husband if I can't give my wife the time and money she needs to minister in the way she's gifted, I'm failing as a father if I can't teach my children that life is not all about them and sometimes we have to give up what we want to serve our maker, and I'm failing my church if I leave any part of my life unsacrificed for its cause. I'm very tempted to go on a rant about how people like to claim they're "sold out for Jesus" but somehow they can't give their local church body, the very instrument God designed for us to use as our primary ministry outlet, it's proper due. I've heard people complain about a church ministry that demands more than an hour or two of their time every week, and I'm thinking, hmm, what does that say about your priorities? You shouldn't build church around your life, you should build your life around church. Maybe that means you don't take that promotion because it would mean you'd have to give up teaching Sunday School. Maybe it means you don't go back for your Ph.D. because you'd no longer have time to listen to neighborhood kids say their Bible verses. Maybe it means you pass on an evening out with your friends because it would mean losing sleep, which would mean getting to church late the next morning and not being able to meet God or his people due to your exhaustion. Maybe it means you don't spend your lunch breaks ranting on some stupid blog and instead spend that time in prayer. It would be fitting for me wrap this all up with a lyric from the pen of Andrew Peterson, whose music I "discovered" this year and will forever be changed for the better. I'd say this sums up year quite nicely: I am tangled up in contradiction
I am strangled by my own two hands
I am hunted by the hounds of addiction
Hosanna I have lied to everyone who trusts me
I have tried to fall when I could stand
I have only loved the ones who love me
Hosanna Hail the long awaited king
Come to set his people free
Hosanna
Come and tear this temple down
Raise it up on holy ground
Hosanna
I will lift my voice and sing
You have come and washed me clean
Hosanna | 
